Once again, I hate dating....
"Holy shit girl! You're not even putting out and he gave you a toothbrush?! Day-um!!"
So, why do I hate dating today? (And don't even ask me because Cute Boy and I have gone on another date but we still haven't discussed whether or not we are dating. For now I'm telling people that he's a Cute Boy who I'm going on dates with. That's fair, no?)
Because dating is expensive.
And I'm perpetually broke.
I haven't bought groceries in weeks. I am having major money anxiety. (But, I don't think I'm going to starve. My body can subsist on the 20 pounds it's gained over the last few months before I get desperate).
This is how I feel about boys (Cute Boy in particular) paying. If I could have afforded the outing for one or both of us anyhow, I don't have a problem with him paying. It's when I don't have enough to cover at the very minimum, my share of the outing, I feel guilty. And Cute Boy and I always end up doing a lot of things when we go out!
Like on Friday night, we went to like four different things. (Pub, Imax movie [how fun was that??], then dinner, then a club). And I paid the Imax but sheesh how much did he spend on other stuff?
And the problem is that I just feel like such a loser to bring this sort of thing up. "Oh, by the way, I'm totally broke. Let's spend the rest of our time together watching public television and playing with my cat".
Urgh. I need a better job.
My Analysis of Scientific Though prof has cancelled Wednesday's class. Which means, I have all the time in the world now to press the snooze button. I LOVE the snooze button. It's probably the best button in the history of buttons. And this one ALWAYS works. I think that I'm actually going to set my alarm as though I were getting up for my eight o'clock class, and then just spend the next three hours pressing the snooze button.
Oh and what makes Wednesday even better? Cute Boy said maybe we could meet up for coffee or something. *Sigh* *grin*
Check out my msn group http://groups.msn.com/rockinred to hear the latest update on my cat. She's lost it and I have only myself to blame.
Mommy dearest says that I should start back on my meds again.
You know what?
She's right. I've lost it.
You know what else?
I can't bring my self to admit that this thing has won over me yet again. I hate this thing that has taken over my life and even worse, I hate that I can't stop it from taking over. *Picture me cursing and saying a lot of swear words here*
But, I'll be fine. I always am, right?