A Very Berry Way to Be...

I have left home temporarily to move to a place that I call BerryLand. It is here that I practice my skills as a fruit farm field manager, telling people where to pick and occasionally being swarmed by hoardes of large insects. Fortunately, I bought (Or rather, made my mother buy) TWO containers of insect repellent. Its the fancy kind with all kinds of harmful chemicals in it that are sure to guarantee that I won't be able to bear children in the future.

Before I left home I thought I would go out and say good-bye to my horse, my lovely Zydo who I have to leave behind for the next three weeks. I thought that I could shed a tear, and that he would nuzzle up to me and lean his face on my shoulder, and in his Horse-y way, he would say "I don't know how we will live apart!" and then forlornly look with disinterest at the pasture around him.

But when I went to the pasture, he just sort of looked over at me without really lifting his head, and when I motioned that he should come near me, he snorted into the grass and presented me with his but. I chirped at him once or twice and even my Dad's horse, Tia, looked away. Instead of wimpering about his undying love in my ear, he instead presented me with his ass and called over his shoulder "I'd love to say Good-Bye, Hun, but I've got some grass to attend to. Now go away from the fence, you're embarrassing me in front of this cute Arabian Saddlebred Cross I'm trying to impress!"

You know, they made a movie about that horse whisperer guy, but here I am getting horses to yell things disdainfully over their shoulders. I really think I should get a book deal, at the very least.