Wednesday, August 30, 2006

I'm at home right now...

Finally back at the ranch, which is exactly what I've wanted for weeks now.

My reason for visiting has not been so great as my grandfather has become ill.

My Grandad was diagnosed with Alzheimer's in the summer of 2002. So, we've known for a while that something like this has been coming. But you can't really prepare for something you don't want, no matter how much you know it is coming.

I try as much as I can to keep personal family business off my blog. Oh, sure, I occasionally post little tidbits such as the fact that we're all insane, but the really juicy details don't go on the blog.

My grandfather has always been a very personal person. I'm not sure if it's his generation or his personality, but he has always had the attitude of putting on a happy face and liking it. You shouldn't wash your laundry in private and all that; and, in fact, he kept his outdoor clothesline behind the house in the corner of the lawn that no one could see from the street.

I don't know if my Grandad even knew what the internet was before his illness got severe; I don't know if he even knew what it was for. I have strong doubts that he has the foggiest clue as to what the hell a blog is, or why you would write one. So I somehow doubt that he would like his condition discussed on the internet.

So, Grandad is sick and I'm not sure what to do with myself. Being at the hospital with him all day is hard... I've started helping out with his care a little bit, keeping him clean and his outfit tidy and such. He always liked everything neat and tidy. I dare anyone to find a weed in his lawn, and I'll pay you every penny I have, because there would not be a single one. So it makes me feel better when I can wash his face for him and tidy his hair, and that sort of thing.

I'm so surprised at myself, as well. I've never been one to enjoy being around people who are remotely sick. When SuperNan has a cold with a runny nose, my reaction is to stay away at all costs. So I was pretty scared when I saw my big, strong Grandad in a hospital bed and shocked the first time that I tidied him up and told him I would try and make him look like a million bucks.

He winked at me for that.

It was more rewarding than anything ever has been in this world.



Blogger Siuan said...

Lot's of hugs Toonses! I've had a grandparent with Alzhiemers and I know what it's like. I wish you and your family lots of good memories and feeling about your grandad!It's nice that you can be there with him.

7:19 p.m.  
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