Saturday, June 28, 2008

Back from BerryLand...

My time at BerryLand this year was short, and if I dwell on that fact for thirty more seconds today, I might just curl up into a ball and weep until next year. My time at Berry Season was traumatic and stressful for those around me. I was plagued by nightmares and anxiety until, on Thursday, I was simply exhausted and had no more anxiety to give. The night previous to that, I had ground (Grinded?) my teeth until I woke up in the morning with bleeding gums, and I thought to myself, HEY! Maybe I should wear that fancy retainer I got two years ago to prevent this very type of situation.

Fortunately, I had it packed and was able to wake free of bleeding gums. Sadly, not so free of headaches and a stiff and crackly jaw. There was a spot on my leg and a spot on my arm that appeared to be on the verge of hives. Fortunately, I staved those spots of hives off with a nice, cold, refreshing beverage of my choice.

Oh, being a raving lunatic! How I love thee!

I returned home tonight to greet my horse. My wonderful, tall and handsome horse who greeted me by throwing his giant head over the gate and nearly knocked me unconscious with his unwieldy jaw. He was full of energy and dragged me through the mud into the barn.

And then he was in his stall and he nuzzled his sweet face up next to me, and I saw with horror the condition of his shiny, well-muscled Thouroughbred body.

He was coated in mosquito bites from one end to the other such that his entire coat resembled ... Well, something very, very bumpy.

I was glad for all the rain we've gotten this year for a brief second, because it would be nothing short of cruelty to animals to place a saddle on top of those hundreds of mosquito bites. And I can't imagine what the cruelty to animals people would think if I put a saddle on all those bites and then placed my giant, unwieldy butt into it.

I like this. My horse has an unwieldy jaw, I have an unwieldy butt.

We are clearly a match made in heaven.

I doused him heavily with bug spray and plan on doing more of the same tomorrow. If it weren't so damn humid out, I would purchase him a fly sheet for summer wear. But the last time I searched for a blanket for my oversized horse, I nearly bankrupted myself.


Labels: , , ,


Anonymous Joomy said...

Oh poor Zydo! I never even THOUGHT of horsies having to deal with skeeter bites!

It is just too cruel.

The effers sure are out with a vengeance and the damn things adore my blood so I didn't escape being bitten today, in the pouring rain, no less (I know they love water but it was POURING, hard enough for the rain drops to slay them I thought).

It's a bit strange to me that berry season is over already. All this rain cannot have been good for business, was it?

"Oh, being a raving lunatic! How I love thee!" made me laugh...thanks!

2:42 a.m.  
Blogger Jummy said...

Well I meant that berry seasons is over for you

2:43 a.m.  

Post a Comment

<< Home