Thursday, November 19, 2009

One Hundred Things About The Toonse Brigade

1. I have brown hair

2. I have Blue eyes.

3. I capitalize words that don't really require capitalization.

4. I'm not sure how tall I am in feet.

5. In centimetres, I am 171.5.

6. I'm never sure what my shoes size is

7. I am baffled by clothing sizes and I don't really know for sure what size I am

8. I am overly attached to the animals in my life

9. Zydeco came into my life on June 8, 2007

10. I don't know the date that Dixie came into my life but it was late summer and I was sixteen

11. I hate feet

12. I also hate sandals

13. I feel like people should not be allowed to wear sandals in my presence

14. I am bad at dating

15. But I have been on a lot of dates

16. I live with my parents and I am not entirely uncomfortable with this

17. My horse lives here, too

18. I detest people who use poor grammar

19. I consider myself a redneck but I don't meet very many redneck standards

20. I had my teeth fixed when I was between the ages of 10 and 14. My teeth are very straight now.

21. I take very good care of my teeth.

22. I own three guitars, all of which I play with the same level of incompetence

23. I name things: My first laptop was named Gretchen and my new laptop is named Alfonso

24. I've never shot anything while out hunting

25. I don't know how I feel about actually shooting something

26. I was 19 years old when I rented my first apartment

27. Soon after renting my first apartment, I named it Hell and the proceeded to live there for two full years

28. When I moved home, I wanted to be a strawberry farmer

29. I have no idea why my strawberry farm never came to be, except that I've been doing things other than planting fruit

30. I spent six years of my life managing a strawberry farm during summer breaks

31. My mother was diagnosed with cancer in January of 2007. She made a full recovery and didn't even whine over any of the procedures she had to endure

32. The Toonse Brigade is a nickname my brother came up with for me when I was young

33. It is actually a skit from Saturday Night Live. Apparently there was a skit about Toonses the Driving Cat

34. I did not see this skit until I was twenty five years old

35. By the time I saw the skit, this had been my nickname for over a decade

36. I have two biological brothers

37. I have two other brothers who I consider my brothers because of the amount of time we spent growing up

38. I have two nephews and two nieces.

39. I only see one nephew with any regularity

40. This makes me quite sad

41. I believe that cowboy boots have the ability to make you feel like a better person

42. I also believe that boot cut jeans area gift from heaven

43. I'm religious, but I don't attend church services

44. I battle with my addiction to cigarettes

45. Some days I don't smoke and some days I do

46. I have a general hatred for the medical profession

47. I have a brother who has served in Afghanistan three times

48. I am bad at make up

49. I often look orange once I've applied makeup

50. I depend on others to tell me when I look orange due to poor makeup application

51. I have an obsession with socks

52. I hoard socks and have quite an impressive collection

53. I was quite literally scared of the dark until I was nineteen years old

54. I was scared of spiders until I was sixteen years old

55. I have never been in a car accident

56. I once fell off my bike and knocked out my top four front teeth

57. I had braces at the time, so my natural teeth remained with me

58. Sometimes I think I would like to get a boob job

59. I really can't afford a boob job

60. I would like to buy a house here in CowTown

61. I refer to my hometown as CowTown

62. I dislike people breathing near me

63. I have issues with people being in close proximity to me

64. I'm working on that one

65. I was divorced when I was nineteen

66. I used to be embarrassed and ashamed that I have a failed marriage in my history.

67. I think it took me about five years to be comfortable with that little factoid about myself

68. I have never been on an airplane, seen the ocean, or been to Disney World

69. I don't really feel deprived about those things

70. One time, I let a drunk person pluck my eyebrows

71. Those eyebrows turned out better than when I pluck my eyebrows by myself

72. For three months, when I was in university, I lived on a couch that still belongs to a girl named Mal

73. Those were some of the best months of my life

74. During that time, I wrote a novel

75. The novel that I wrote is not very good: it is disorganized and long-winded

76. I tend to be generally disorganized and long-winded

77. I am writing a One Hundred Things List to replace the one I wrote several years ago.

78. I do believe that this list is a bit more inclusive

79. I once went to a horse show and won red ribbons and a prize for being top scorer in my division

80. That day still gives me a thrill to think about

81. When I get bored, I sit at my computer and look at pictures of me and my horse

82. Then I critique them and curse myself for not being a better rider

83. I own a Gibson ES137. It is a limited edition and has a real pearl inlay on the fretboard

84. One time I went to an open mic night and the announcer spent more time announcing my guitar than he did announcing me

85. When I was 20, I made a demo CD

86. When I was 21, I made another demo CD

87. When I was 22, my uncle sent out some of my demos to record companies, thinking he would get me a record deal without me even knowing about it

88. Instead, I got rejected by record companies without even knowing that I was up for rejection

89. I used to think that I might get famous some day.

90. I'm totally cool with not getting famous at this point in my life

91. I don't know if I want to have children at some point

92. When I was dating the man who is now my ex husband, I was so excited to spend a day with him that I spent fourteen hours sitting on the fender of his tractor while he hauled wagons during hay season

93. The lyrics of country music songs can make me cry

94. I have a specific playlist of music that I listen to when I want to cry

95. I cry over a lot of things, most of which are not worth shedding tears over

96. One of the most precious memories I have of my nephew is him offering me a Kleenex when he was about three. I had been crying and he came to me and said "Clean eyes for Auntie"

97. I don't watch very many movies

98. But I love horror movies

99. I don't know how to change the barrel of my own gun

100. It took me about twenty five minutes to complete this list

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1 Comments:

Anonymous Jummy said...

25 minutes is fast in my opinion!

2:51 PM  

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