Thursday, November 19, 2009

One Hundred Things About The Toonse Brigade

1. I have brown hair

2. I have Blue eyes.

3. I capitalize words that don't really require capitalization.

4. I'm not sure how tall I am in feet.

5. In centimetres, I am 171.5.

6. I'm never sure what my shoes size is

7. I am baffled by clothing sizes and I don't really know for sure what size I am

8. I am overly attached to the animals in my life

9. Zydeco came into my life on June 8, 2007

10. I don't know the date that Dixie came into my life but it was late summer and I was sixteen

11. I hate feet

12. I also hate sandals

13. I feel like people should not be allowed to wear sandals in my presence

14. I am bad at dating

15. But I have been on a lot of dates

16. I live with my parents and I am not entirely uncomfortable with this

17. My horse lives here, too

18. I detest people who use poor grammar

19. I consider myself a redneck but I don't meet very many redneck standards

20. I had my teeth fixed when I was between the ages of 10 and 14. My teeth are very straight now.

21. I take very good care of my teeth.

22. I own three guitars, all of which I play with the same level of incompetence

23. I name things: My first laptop was named Gretchen and my new laptop is named Alfonso

24. I've never shot anything while out hunting

25. I don't know how I feel about actually shooting something

26. I was 19 years old when I rented my first apartment

27. Soon after renting my first apartment, I named it Hell and the proceeded to live there for two full years

28. When I moved home, I wanted to be a strawberry farmer

29. I have no idea why my strawberry farm never came to be, except that I've been doing things other than planting fruit

30. I spent six years of my life managing a strawberry farm during summer breaks

31. My mother was diagnosed with cancer in January of 2007. She made a full recovery and didn't even whine over any of the procedures she had to endure

32. The Toonse Brigade is a nickname my brother came up with for me when I was young

33. It is actually a skit from Saturday Night Live. Apparently there was a skit about Toonses the Driving Cat

34. I did not see this skit until I was twenty five years old

35. By the time I saw the skit, this had been my nickname for over a decade

36. I have two biological brothers

37. I have two other brothers who I consider my brothers because of the amount of time we spent growing up

38. I have two nephews and two nieces.

39. I only see one nephew with any regularity

40. This makes me quite sad

41. I believe that cowboy boots have the ability to make you feel like a better person

42. I also believe that boot cut jeans area gift from heaven

43. I'm religious, but I don't attend church services

44. I battle with my addiction to cigarettes

45. Some days I don't smoke and some days I do

46. I have a general hatred for the medical profession

47. I have a brother who has served in Afghanistan three times

48. I am bad at make up

49. I often look orange once I've applied makeup

50. I depend on others to tell me when I look orange due to poor makeup application

51. I have an obsession with socks

52. I hoard socks and have quite an impressive collection

53. I was quite literally scared of the dark until I was nineteen years old

54. I was scared of spiders until I was sixteen years old

55. I have never been in a car accident

56. I once fell off my bike and knocked out my top four front teeth

57. I had braces at the time, so my natural teeth remained with me

58. Sometimes I think I would like to get a boob job

59. I really can't afford a boob job

60. I would like to buy a house here in CowTown

61. I refer to my hometown as CowTown

62. I dislike people breathing near me

63. I have issues with people being in close proximity to me

64. I'm working on that one

65. I was divorced when I was nineteen

66. I used to be embarrassed and ashamed that I have a failed marriage in my history.

67. I think it took me about five years to be comfortable with that little factoid about myself

68. I have never been on an airplane, seen the ocean, or been to Disney World

69. I don't really feel deprived about those things

70. One time, I let a drunk person pluck my eyebrows

71. Those eyebrows turned out better than when I pluck my eyebrows by myself

72. For three months, when I was in university, I lived on a couch that still belongs to a girl named Mal

73. Those were some of the best months of my life

74. During that time, I wrote a novel

75. The novel that I wrote is not very good: it is disorganized and long-winded

76. I tend to be generally disorganized and long-winded

77. I am writing a One Hundred Things List to replace the one I wrote several years ago.

78. I do believe that this list is a bit more inclusive

79. I once went to a horse show and won red ribbons and a prize for being top scorer in my division

80. That day still gives me a thrill to think about

81. When I get bored, I sit at my computer and look at pictures of me and my horse

82. Then I critique them and curse myself for not being a better rider

83. I own a Gibson ES137. It is a limited edition and has a real pearl inlay on the fretboard

84. One time I went to an open mic night and the announcer spent more time announcing my guitar than he did announcing me

85. When I was 20, I made a demo CD

86. When I was 21, I made another demo CD

87. When I was 22, my uncle sent out some of my demos to record companies, thinking he would get me a record deal without me even knowing about it

88. Instead, I got rejected by record companies without even knowing that I was up for rejection

89. I used to think that I might get famous some day.

90. I'm totally cool with not getting famous at this point in my life

91. I don't know if I want to have children at some point

92. When I was dating the man who is now my ex husband, I was so excited to spend a day with him that I spent fourteen hours sitting on the fender of his tractor while he hauled wagons during hay season

93. The lyrics of country music songs can make me cry

94. I have a specific playlist of music that I listen to when I want to cry

95. I cry over a lot of things, most of which are not worth shedding tears over

96. One of the most precious memories I have of my nephew is him offering me a Kleenex when he was about three. I had been crying and he came to me and said "Clean eyes for Auntie"

97. I don't watch very many movies

98. But I love horror movies

99. I don't know how to change the barrel of my own gun

100. It took me about twenty five minutes to complete this list



Anonymous Jummy said...

25 minutes is fast in my opinion!

2:51 p.m.  

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