I have a problem...

My problem is that I'm hungry.

Most normal people, upon realizing that they are hungry, would go and get something to eat.

My roommate and I went grocery shopping the other day, so we even have a ton of food in the house. It's heavenly.

The problem? Lies in the fact that I neglected to buy any breakfast food.

I have some leftover oatmeal from last year, and I would eat that... But I have no milk.

So I'm thinking.... since I've lived in this apartment, I've done very student-like things: I've had a party, gotten my cat high, and found a coffee table in the dumpster.

Should I take my student-ness one notch higher and eat some ravioli from the can for breakfast? Or would that be taking matters a little too far?

I went on a job interview earlier this week and really felt that I had nailed it; the call is supposed to come in today as to whether or not I got the job. So I hope I did... I could really use some cash at this point!

ALSO, I called my SubShack boss and asked for my job back.

Know what he said? He said: "Anything for you, my friend! Anything for you!"

Which makes me feel really bad about hating my job. Because my boss and the people I work with are so great; it's unfortunate that the public has to go and be all snooty and ruin my good time at work. That's the way the cookie crumbles, I guess.

Toonses