Sunday, July 23, 2006

Police, Police, Police...

So, my dear friend Kanobe posted a comment a few entries back about dentists. He mentioned that there should be someone to check in on people in professions like dentists and vets to make sure they're not ripping us off.

At first (Sorry, Bud) I was thinking "How stupid! More government intrusion! That's ridiculous!"

But then I got to thinking.

We have the Shit Police, and the Fire Police, and the Water Police, and the Well Police, and the Building Police, and the Septic Tank Police.

Then we have the Church Supper Police, the Child Welfare Police, The Public Safety Police, the Cat and Dog Police, the Smoking Police and the Pooper Scooper Police.

City folks deal with things like the Deck Police, the Patio Police, the Pool Police, the Tree Police, and my personal favorite: The Biking on the Bike Path Police.

Let's not forget the Chemical Storage Police, the Gun Police, and the Workplace Safety Police.

Now, as some of you may know, and others of you may not know, these police are mostly in charge of looking after the business of people living their lives on privately owned land. (I'm really, really trying not to be a political lunatic here. I swear.)

Most of these Police are costing those who own the private land money to the tune of hundreds of thousands of dollars. (Ever had to pay to dig a new well because the Water Police and the Well Police decided you shouldn't be drinking from your old one? For a lark some day, you should look up the cost of digging a well. It'll boggle your mind.)

(Did you know that all the people who inspect our farms get paid out of our pockets? That when the Shit Police decide you need a new place to store your shit, and one that meets government regulations, YOU [the farmer] has to pay for it with no subsidization?)

So now.

I went in to the dentist today to get my SuperCool Highly Sexy Retainer. In the parking lot was an older model F-150, my Mom's Saturn Vue, and a random assortment of four door Mommy-Cars.

And a Chrysler 300.

And a fucking Corvette.

How come there's no Dentist Police? These OfficeFucks can afford to drive a feakin' Corvette through charging me six hundred dollars to fix something that I have to use my imagination to see... How come they don't have a system that comes and checks their records? Someone who has been trained to read X-rays so they can actually be held accountable when they charge some poor fool who can't read X-rays for nothing?

I wonder if you can get a job as a lobbyist with a degree in sociology? If folks want government intrusion... Dude, I can think of all kinds of things I'd like to see intruded on.



Anonymous Jummy said...

Hmm, if there isn't at all a regulating body for dentists then you might want to switch to a dentist you can trust if that's possible.

I like my dentist. When I was in that awkward stage (too old to be under my dad's dental plan and out of school so couldn't be under the school dental plan), I found out that I had to fill three cavities following my checkup. She told me that it would be $325. I shrugged and said ok (my notorious candy chomping habits mean cavities every few years...I guess I've accepted it). The appointment was booked and I went.

Following the appointment, she gave me a bill for $300. Now I know it's only $25 difference but when you're poor and working three jobs in the hopes of saving up for a future of singledom, being able to support a cat and buy one rocking chair, $25 means a lot. Even so, I told her that she had originally told me that it was going to cost me $325.

She thanked me for pointing it out and said that when she started filling the cavities, one was smaller than she had thought from the x-ray, hence the reduction in price.

(The fact that the average cavity costs $75-$100 to fill in the first place does have me cringing a bit)

Anyhow, she's pretty good I guess. Even so I'm sure she makes a very nice cut (75%?) from my candy habit. I'd recommend you shop around if you can...but sometimes convenience prevents that from being a real option.

3:48 p.m.  

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