Saturday, May 05, 2007

Those words you just die to hear....

Some people dream about the words they want to hear from others. They daydream about their lover saying their name late at night, or hearing that someone loves them. Some people fantasize about the first time their baby says 'Mama', or the first time someone looks at them with sincerity in their eyes and says something nice.

I've never really been one to sit and wonder about the words that make my heart soar. Sometimes words happen, and you feel good about it, and you walk around with a ridiculous, goofy grin on your face for days to follow.

I love it when my heart smiles. You know that feeling, when you just feel good and happy inside, and everything is ok, and scary things like cancer and diseases and financial disasters and boys who never return your calls leave your mind completely, and there is nothing but a smiling heart left behind?

The Precious Boy was riding his bike the other day, exhausting me to the point that I thought I would fall over. And I was running alongside him, panting, gasping for breath and praying that he would just get bored and want to go inside because MY GOD I THOUGHT MY LUNGS WERE ABOUT TO EXPLODE.

And out of nowhere, he just yelled out "Let go of me, Auntie! Don't hold on any more!" And I let go, and I ran alongside him still, and he flew up and down the laneway several more times that afternoon without the aid of someone holding his bike up for him.

And I never really thought that hearing someone tell me to let go, to not hold them any more would ever make me happy. But I did let go, and I stopped holding on, and my heart smiled because here was this person who was once a tiny little blob who couldn't even hold his own head up... flying down the laneway, leaving me in the dust.


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